A Pilot Wife Life

MeMo: A Pilot Wife Life
Featuring Kathryn Holcomb

Today, I feature work from a fellow pilot wife, Kathryn Holcomb, at the end of this post for you to enjoy. Beautifully written, capturing her feelings and that of so many others in the aviation community, I feel her words deeply. Pilots are working at their “office” in the sky and their partners are flying solo on the home front. Like military families, our life rhythm is different than others who work a Monday through Friday, 8am-5pm job. Aviation schedules are constantly changing, and days of the week are a concept of a reality that I don’t live in. What day is actually a weekend? For us, that’s often a Tuesday and Wednesday or a random Thursday. Coordination is key. People who want to be part of our lives must adapt or be constantly disappointed. Holidays typically are a workday for our families and celebrations get shifted to accommodate our fluid schedule and lifestyle. We don’t fall in line with traditional anything. We are forging our own path and traditions.

Our lives are unique, sometimes lonely, and often require us to start over again and again. Like many military families who move from base to base for a job, pilot families have to consider if we want to commute so we don’t have to move again. We live life alongside others, yet often many feel alone. Kathryn reminds us we are not alone in her words when she writes, “To every pilot wife, partner, and spouse quietly carrying the weight…. I see you.”

Kathryn’s words below encompass so many things pilot families encounter. Over the years, I introduced my husband to people with a picture. Many friends would not meet my partner until later, if at all. A common phrase myself and so many others in aviation have said over the years about their partner is, “I promise, they exist; they aren’t imaginary.”

Over the last twenty years, we have lived an unconventional life to chased my husband’s dream job of working for a major airline. We made it with no shortage of hardships, memories, and success along the way. It’s hard to encompass one’s aviation career and family experience in a sentence, let alone a cohesive stream of thoughts that are understandable to others outside of our reality. Kathryn did that for me. She shares her heart-felt words of life experience, touching my heart deeply. She feels the ache, knows the longing, and speaks from her soul. Please enjoy reading her work below.

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By: Kathryn Holcomb

Somewhere out there, a woman is wiping noses with one hand and answering work emails with the other, wondering if anyone sees how hard she’s trying.

Another is watching her partner pack for another trip, aching for connection they haven’t had the energy to rebuild.

There are empty beds, half-finished conversations, milestones missed, and moments held in quiet strength. There’s guilt in the joy, exhaustion in the love, and resilience in every tear that’s wiped away before anyone notices.

To the pilot wives, partners, and spouses carrying invisible loads today, you are not alone. Your love is enough. Your strength is quiet, steady, and sacred. And somewhere out here, another woman understands.

To every pilot wife, partner, and spouse quietly carrying the weight…. I see you.

I love you lots, xo
© Kathryn Holcomb

Find Kathryn at:
Fb: Dolphinkisses05
IG: Kat_Holcomb_
TT: Kat_holcolmb02

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Thank you, Kathryn, for your words and authenticity.

If this blog was helpful to you or may be for someone you know, please share it.
With gratitude-
Signing off,
-BG Barnstormer
AKA Auntie Birdie